Better late than never. 2011 is promising to be an interesting year. Matthew and I are expecting our first child this September! I guess that means all bets are off if you were part of the group of people mocking our wedding lol. Sorry to disappoint, but we got pregnant in January :) And we couldn't be happier.
Tomorrow I will be 21 weeks. Pregnancy has been kind to me. I believe that this is a very mellow baby, like his father. When I say kind, I don't mean drama free. I have had more than my share of horrors this pregnancy and don't wish to go into detail explaining them. Tomorrow we have our 5th ultrasound!
2011 means saying hello to a new baby and saying goodbye to a loved friend. My beloved dog Dino, passed away suddenly in the middle of a person tornado. I have never been more depressed in my entire life, than I was when Dino died. He died right on my lap, with a great big smile on his face. He was 11 years old and the best damn dog I could have ever asked for. He was the dog everyone loved to hate but he could always cheer you up. He was my best friend....my baby and I miss him more than any human being I have ever known. He was the last part of my old life... and the last thing I could hold on too to having that life back. Now he is gone...just like my old family. Now I get to focus on starting my own family...a new beginning.
The tornado has settled for now and I can smile again. Marrying Matthew was the best thing I could have ever done. He makes me so happy. He is going to be such a great father. He is my everything and all I need in this world to be happy. I am so blessed to have him in my life and for us to watch our love grow into a wonderful little baby. No doubt about it, this baby is going to be loved to pieces. We have a wonderful support group and amazing friends.
I love my new life. It is everything I could have wanted it to be a more. I have always been a believer in fate. I look back on my life one year ago and I was wedding planning (the good, the bad, the ugly) and didn't think I could get any happier (despite the drama) but I am a zillion times happier now, than I was then. Crazy things are happening and I always knew things would be ok...the rest of the world just needs to chill.
So happy :)
Monday, May 9, 2011
Sunday, January 2, 2011
Divorce rates for 2010-cheers to a 2011
Did you know that in 2010 the USA was ranked number one in highest divorce rates? We had 4.95 per 1,000 people divorces in 2010. In 2006 my family joined the club and I can honestly say that it destroyed my family. Matt has also been a victim of divorce when his family was split around 2003.
I came from a family of 4 children and two parents. We had a single house and a good education. We had good friends and use to sit down and eat dinner as a family every night. We use to go up the mountains every year to pick pumpkins and cut down Christmas trees. During the summer, friends use to come over and swim in my pool for hours and we use to dive for pennies and tan on beaches. That is a very brief summary of what we use to have and how I and everyone else saw our family.
In 2006, everything changed. Violence arose and corruption and adultery aired its ugly head. Children were separated and beaten on the ground. Horrible names were called and police became frequent visitors. Our neighbors looked at us differently and friends we use to have became distant. It was and feels like it always will be an ugly war to destroy everything that use to be good...including the children and what makes the children happy.
Divorces should not include and destroy the lives of the children involved. The children did nothing wrong, they are simply reacting to the changes occurring in their lives. Life should be as normal as possible for those children because regardless of how much the parents try, the lives of the children have been flipped upside down. They went years knowing a specific routine and all of a sudden their lives are changed and they suddenly have two fighting parents who live apart.
Dear Parents or Future Parents,
Divorce can ruin your family. There is no 'right' way to leave your husband or wife but there is a mature and adult way to deal with it. If you are not mature enough for a divorce then do not get offended when your children hate you. You cannot make your children decide on who they love and if you are able to brain wash them then I hope you go to hell. You were clearly not built for the amazing sacrament of marriage and for the blessing of children so just do everyone a favor and keep your feelings towards your ex separate from your children. Remember that continuous love and support created and held your relationship with your family and in order to maintain that relationship you need to continue doing that. Calling your husband a "m-fer" or a "monster" is not healthy for the relationship you want to maintain you your kids. Destroying friendships is not a mature way to secure your relationship with your kids and will only lead to bad results.
I am sharing this first hand. America, wake up. This hasn't just happened to me... it happens to most divorced families.
As a newly wed who has been with my husband for a wonderful 6 years before we even tied the knot, I am letting the world wide web know that I do not intend on divorcing my husband. I swore in front of God and my friends that I would stay with Matthew through the good and the bad regardless of health, wealth, and death do us part.
If I could recommend something...
You know who you are...
Leave us alone. You did enough damage but not enough to destroy our spirits. Leave our brothers and sisters alone. Stop pretending to be someone you are not and come clean... you will get more respect that way. Stop focusing on finding 'love' when your kids don't even talk to you. The 'love' you are searching for will never replace what you lost and what you are losing. Your actions have consequences and they have hurt more people than you think they have.
To those who have been hurt by divorce,
I am sorry. When you find love, understand that it is serious. It is not a fairytale and its not a game. People do ugly things for different reasons. Prioritize what is the most important thing in your life and stick with it. Bad things sometimes happens to good people and in the game of love... sometimes nasty moves are made to destroy the other person. Life isn't fair and you will come out stronger in the end. Sometimes blood isn't thicker than water and it is ok to cut loose a relative as long as your happier and healthier in the end.
We are happier and healthier without you. 2011 is going to be a year without the petty drama. 2011 is a year where I am married and your opinion of me or Matthew does nothing because you are no longer in our circle of trust. We no longer mourn you and do not wish to continue a relationship with you. When you are ready to act your age and realize where you messed up, you have our number and will leave a message. There will be no more molesting boyfriends, no more false IEP claims, no more 'cunt' calling, no more allowing your daughter to call people a "m-effer", no more abuse or restraining orders, no more control issues, and no more lectures in wedding cards. We see you for who you really are and you are uglier than who you use to be. We wish you the best recovery and hope one day you find God and peace in your life because you are going to need it.
Cheers to 2011 and being drama free! Anyone who wants to embrace this new life style or reconcile your differences is more than welcome to join in on our celebration!
RIP:
Matts family minus one...
My family when we use to be happy even though I don't look it...
I came from a family of 4 children and two parents. We had a single house and a good education. We had good friends and use to sit down and eat dinner as a family every night. We use to go up the mountains every year to pick pumpkins and cut down Christmas trees. During the summer, friends use to come over and swim in my pool for hours and we use to dive for pennies and tan on beaches. That is a very brief summary of what we use to have and how I and everyone else saw our family.
In 2006, everything changed. Violence arose and corruption and adultery aired its ugly head. Children were separated and beaten on the ground. Horrible names were called and police became frequent visitors. Our neighbors looked at us differently and friends we use to have became distant. It was and feels like it always will be an ugly war to destroy everything that use to be good...including the children and what makes the children happy.
Divorces should not include and destroy the lives of the children involved. The children did nothing wrong, they are simply reacting to the changes occurring in their lives. Life should be as normal as possible for those children because regardless of how much the parents try, the lives of the children have been flipped upside down. They went years knowing a specific routine and all of a sudden their lives are changed and they suddenly have two fighting parents who live apart.
Dear Parents or Future Parents,
Divorce can ruin your family. There is no 'right' way to leave your husband or wife but there is a mature and adult way to deal with it. If you are not mature enough for a divorce then do not get offended when your children hate you. You cannot make your children decide on who they love and if you are able to brain wash them then I hope you go to hell. You were clearly not built for the amazing sacrament of marriage and for the blessing of children so just do everyone a favor and keep your feelings towards your ex separate from your children. Remember that continuous love and support created and held your relationship with your family and in order to maintain that relationship you need to continue doing that. Calling your husband a "m-fer" or a "monster" is not healthy for the relationship you want to maintain you your kids. Destroying friendships is not a mature way to secure your relationship with your kids and will only lead to bad results.
I am sharing this first hand. America, wake up. This hasn't just happened to me... it happens to most divorced families.
As a newly wed who has been with my husband for a wonderful 6 years before we even tied the knot, I am letting the world wide web know that I do not intend on divorcing my husband. I swore in front of God and my friends that I would stay with Matthew through the good and the bad regardless of health, wealth, and death do us part.
If I could recommend something...
You know who you are...
Leave us alone. You did enough damage but not enough to destroy our spirits. Leave our brothers and sisters alone. Stop pretending to be someone you are not and come clean... you will get more respect that way. Stop focusing on finding 'love' when your kids don't even talk to you. The 'love' you are searching for will never replace what you lost and what you are losing. Your actions have consequences and they have hurt more people than you think they have.
To those who have been hurt by divorce,
I am sorry. When you find love, understand that it is serious. It is not a fairytale and its not a game. People do ugly things for different reasons. Prioritize what is the most important thing in your life and stick with it. Bad things sometimes happens to good people and in the game of love... sometimes nasty moves are made to destroy the other person. Life isn't fair and you will come out stronger in the end. Sometimes blood isn't thicker than water and it is ok to cut loose a relative as long as your happier and healthier in the end.
We are happier and healthier without you. 2011 is going to be a year without the petty drama. 2011 is a year where I am married and your opinion of me or Matthew does nothing because you are no longer in our circle of trust. We no longer mourn you and do not wish to continue a relationship with you. When you are ready to act your age and realize where you messed up, you have our number and will leave a message. There will be no more molesting boyfriends, no more false IEP claims, no more 'cunt' calling, no more allowing your daughter to call people a "m-effer", no more abuse or restraining orders, no more control issues, and no more lectures in wedding cards. We see you for who you really are and you are uglier than who you use to be. We wish you the best recovery and hope one day you find God and peace in your life because you are going to need it.
Cheers to 2011 and being drama free! Anyone who wants to embrace this new life style or reconcile your differences is more than welcome to join in on our celebration!
RIP:
Matts family minus one...
My family when we use to be happy even though I don't look it...
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